martes, 27 de marzo de 2012

I'm a lucky girl


My mom always talks about how doors open when I want to do something. Not always but sometimes I really feel like if I were a lucky girl. Well that´s how I feel now.

Last saturday I was reading the web site of a local fertility clinic when something grabbed my atention. They offer what they call "mixed donation". What´s a mixed donation? If you need a fertility treatment but you can´t afford it, they will do it for free if you donate some of your eggs. You have to be a healthy woman, be under 30, you can´t have endometriosis, your hormone levels have to be normal and you can't have any infectious or genetic desease.

At first I thought that was perfect, but then I remembered That I can't legally go through a fertility treatment because I'm single. After reading a little more I realized that they talk about womens, and that they would be evaluated by a psicologist, but they never talk about the "husband". I decided I should ask them a little more information about this program, and see if I qualified for it.

Guess what? I do qualify! even if I'm single. Its seems that not many couples donate eggs/embryos so any chance to get them is good, and it´s not illegal still don't understand why, but I don't mind it either.

The only not good thing is the donor, no one can choose it. They say donors have to be anonymous and they don´t pay to them. Don´t know what to think about this... But I´m a lucky girl, I´m sure

martes, 20 de marzo de 2012

Autumn



Today in my country and in all the southern hemisphere we welcome autumn. I love this season the weather is not too hot or cold. I love it's warmness.

Since I was a little girl unconsciously saw autumn as a new beggining. I think that's because we started school in the fall so I relate it to "new beggining" and that continued through the years.

This year I started a new job, I open a bank account to rise money to buy a house and planned lots of things about my future. So again it's a new beggining for me.

Things have been really good for me since this year started. Everything I planed went great and I hope to continue this way. However I should stop dreaming with houses. I don´t have luck with houses. Do you remember that house I said I liked? guess what, it was sold.

I think I'm good with short term objectives. So all I´m going to do for my future house is to save money. I have set an amount of money for each month and I hope at least to reach that objective.
Each month a new beggining


sábado, 10 de marzo de 2012

Sadness...



That's what I feel right now.
I feel so sad because I can't end this relationship.
I feel sad because I thought it was going to be different.
I feel sad because I don´t want to hurt anyone, I don´t want to be hated.

Why does people change so much?  Is it my fault? 

I can´t stop crying since last night. I feel so guilty, even when I know It wasn´t my fault. I must admit he has helped me a lot, but the price was high. I couldn´t see my friends, I had to stop doing things I love, I had to deal with people I can´t stand, people who treat me like rubbish. And recently he started to say awful things about my family. I can´t accept this!

Why do I feel this way? Because I know he is not bad, it´s just he was raised in a terrible way. Sadly I don't think he would find a woman who hold up all this. 

I wish him the best, but I can´t go. 

I wish I were brave enough to put an end in this relationship but I'm not.

jueves, 8 de marzo de 2012

fate?



I have been looking for a house for a while, even when I didn´t have a good job. Well something strange happens every time I put my eye in a house. 

The first one was sold so quickly that I wanted to cry! The second one was on sale, but suddenly the owner decided he was going to live there again. Bye second house. After that I stopped to look for houses, I didn´t want to get dissapointed again.

 Now guess what? I found a new other house. It's not so far from my parents house you can go there by foot. The location of the house is perfect, the neighborhood is perfect but it has a problem, it´s a little bit deteriorated. However that's not what worries me because some family members can help me to reconstruct it. What really worries me is my historial of "I like that house, house becomes unavailable"

I hope I can get the house I want this time.

lunes, 5 de marzo de 2012

First day


Today was my nephew's first day at school. I can´t believe he is at school!

I  don´t want to sound like an old woman, but time passes so fast! I still remember when he was born, so little and now he's at school.

He was so cute in his school uniform and also nervous. When he had to go inside he started crying, and I wanted to cry to! 

He was at school only three hours because they have a two week adaptation period. After we picked him up we asked him why he cried and he said "I was afraid". So we explained him there's was nothing to be afraid of.


I tried hard to take pictures of him on his first day at school, but he wouldn't let me.  I only took four when he was distracted so no good shoots, but at least I have some pictures.

Now wonder how would be my kids's first day at school.

domingo, 4 de marzo de 2012

What do I need to become a SMC?

I'm a little obsessed with lists, I have always been actually. Recently I made a new list; Things to do/have before becoming a mom. I don´t know if every one has a list, but I consider it's important to have one. Why? because I can put myself short and long term goals.

First thing I need is a house. I have always dream with my house and I know exactly how it´s going to be. But I want to save enough to go out there and buy one,  don´t wanna pay every month for my house (don´t know if there's an english word for that). If I´m going to be a SMC I don´t want to worry about payments,  It's not convinient to have an extra expense.

Next thing in my list is a car. Believe it or not, I don´t own a car and it's necessary, particulary if you are going to be single and with kids. Imagine going to see a doctor with two little kids if don´t have a car. I NEED ONE!

A good job. Now I have two and it's ok. But when I have a baby I wouldn´t like to work twelve hours a day. It's not fair for the kid, and I want to enjoy them.

When I finally achieve all that, and I decide to conceive I´ll need to have enough money to afford fertility treatment. I´ll need about  $5000.

If I succeed and I get pregnant, the baby will need a lot on thing. I want to be ready for that, and give my baby the best I can. I won´t bring a baby to this world if I can´t give she/he a good life quality.


Surely there are more things that are not in this list, but I believe things listed here are the essential ones.

Is there something important missing in my list?





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